So much crap

There is so much negative garbage in the news today, I haven't the mental energy to deal with it all. My mother's Memorial Service is on Saturday. Yesterday I spent 4 hours with my aunt and uncle looking at old photos and videos. I was in a fairly good mood until I went to lay down for bed and the enormity of the loss hit me like a truck. And since then I've been in a funk and down in the depths of sadness, missing my mother terribly. My only consolation is prayer, for thanks be to God I'm not in a state of dryness and confusion. I've been praying the Rosary and Divine Mercy Chaplet for the repose of her soul. I've been reading good religious books. I've remained in a state of grace in order to do these things. But on the flip-side, this alienates my Jewish finance and he's pulling away -emotionally and physically- from me at the one time I need him the most.